Heard through a friend:
`Kid Rock is Michigan's own "FloridaMan"`
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#floridaman
1 post1 participant0 posts today
Today's #FloridaMan story.
> ‘I don’t f—ing care’: Florida man allegedly ‘became upset’ about music during karaoke night and pointed his gun at another bar patron https://lawandcrime.com/crime/i-dont-f-ing-care-florida-man-allegedly-became-upset-about-music-during-karaoke-night-and-pointed-his-gun-at-another-bar-patron/
Law & Crime · Florida man allegedly 'became upset' about music during karaoke night and took his gun outOutside, in front of the bar, another patron was smoking. The smoker then spoke with the defendant in an attempt to calm him down, according to the affidavit. But he apparently could not be consoled.
"Orlando police officer tracks down, returns lost stuffed animal to 6-year-old girl at airport"
A rare #FloridaMan post that doesn't suck donkey balls.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/orlando-police-officer-tracks-down-returns-lost-stuffed-animal-to-6-year-old-girl-at-airport/ar-AA1BkY0K
www.msn.comMSN
#FloridaMan being Florida Man. The bacteria was so rare it took doctors 2 years to figure it out. 
> Florida man eats feral pig meat, contracts rare biothreat bacteria https://arstechnica.com/health/2025/03/florida-man-eats-feral-pig-meat-contracts-rare-biothreat-bacteria/
Ars Technica · Florida man eats feral pig meat, contracts rare biothreat bacteria
Note that #FloridaMan does not waste his beer.
> Florida man takes joyride in stolen ambulance, then finishes beer before taken into custody: Cops https://lawandcrime.com/crime/florida-man-takes-joyride-in-stolen-ambulance-then-finishes-beer-before-taken-into-custody-cops/
Law & Crime · Florida man takes joyride in stolen ambulance, finishes beer before taken into custody: CopsA Florida man who was apparently upset he wasn't receiving a free ride home from the hospital decided to steal an ambulance and lead cops on a police chase, according to troopers.
This just feels very Florida. Only thing would've made it more Florida is if had been trying to avoid a gator. Please do NOT drink and drive.
> Woman died after falling off golf cart driven by drunk driver who swerved to avoid parked car: Police https://lawandcrime.com/crime/woman-died-after-falling-off-golf-cart-driven-by-drunk-driver-who-swerved-to-avoid-parked-car-police/
Law & Crime · Woman died after falling off golf cart driven by drunk driver: PoliceA Florida man was charged with manslaughter after a vacationer fell off a golf cart he was driving, allegedly while under the influence, and died of her injuries.
#TipsFromMasterCriminals: If you plan an assassination, don't ask the cops to give you a ride.
> ‘I’m about to launch f—ing missiles’: Florida man vowed to make it Trump’s ‘last day on earth,’ called 911 to ask for a ride to the assassination, cops say https://lawandcrime.com/crime/im-about-to-launch-f-ing-missiles-florida-man-vowed-to-make-it-trumps-last-day-on-earth-called-911-to-ask-for-a-ride-to-the-assassination-cops-say/
Law & Crime · 'About to launch f---ing missiles': Man vowed to make it Trump's 'last day on earth,' cops sayAccording to a probable cause arrest affidavit, the Palm Beach County 911 dispatch center received nine calls on Feb. 26 from a man who made a slew of threats toward the president.
Replied in thread
@patricks
Penises can be super sad, too.
He looks like his is about to fall off from lack of use.
#MarcoRubio #Rubio
#FloridaMan
Someone *has* to have the video to this.
“Gainesville police arrest man who crashed car into BMW dealership after being denied a test drive”
WCJB · Gainesville police arrest man who crashed car into BMW dealership after being denied a test drive
#FloridaMan Mordechai Brafman, 27, a plumber, who did a U turn in his pickup truck and opened fire on a car about 9:30 p.m. this past Saturday in #MiamiBeach. After arrest he told #Miami police the seventeen shots he proudly fired had killed two #Palestinians.
The gunshot #victims, who were #hospitalized in critical condition and thus far have survived, are #jewish #tourists from #Israel named Ari and Yaron Rabi
https://wapo.st/4gKikaO #FreeGftLnk #SharedStory #Floriduh #WellArmedMilitia #GunSense #FirstAmendmentFaves
#floridaman sells out #ukraine
(... #floridamen ... 
)
Oh the inanity... #FloridaMan helps #Hamas thinking was doing the work of the #IDF.
Man in Florida 'shoots two #Israelis he thought were #Palestinian
https://www.newarab.com/news/man-florida-shoots-two-israelis-he-thought-were-palestinian
The New Arab · Man in Florida 'shoots two Israelis he thought were Palestinian'Though they survived, the suspect, 27-year-old Mordechai Brafman, who shot them 17 times, was charged with attempted murder.
#FloridaMan exemplifying that wholesome, charitable, kind love that #Christians in church are well known for.
> ‘Slammed the car door into her’: Florida man allegedly beats woman over handicapped parking space at church https://lawandcrime.com/crime/slammed-the-car-door-into-her-florida-man-allegedly-beats-woman-over-handicapped-parking-space-at-church/
Law & Crime · Florida man allegedly beats woman over handicapped parking space at churchThe man began yelling that the woman’s handicap placard did not actually belong to her or the car she was in, the affidavit says.
34 yr old son of #basketball great arrested for #Cocaine possession after #Lamborghini of #FloridaMan got stuck on train tracks in #Florida following high speed #police pursuit
Today's #FloridaMan story. Reminder why I never stare nor look too much at anyone out there. Just never know what level of Cray Cray is out there.
> Man who confronted Walgreens customer for looking ‘too hard’ at his girlfriend shot dead in store: Police https://lawandcrime.com/crime/man-who-confronted-walgreens-customer-for-looking-too-hard-at-his-girlfriend-shot-dead-in-store-police/
Law & Crime · Man who confronted Walgreens customer for looking 'too hard' at girlfriend shot dead: CopsA Florida man was denied bond after he was charged with the murder of another man with whom he had an alleged run-in at a drug store.
#FloridaMan keeping it classy at the buffet.
> ‘The large, bald man struck the slimmer man on the head with a dinner plate’: Florida attorney allegedly attacks father of girl who cut in front of him in buffet line at meat station https://lawandcrime.com/crime/the-large-bald-man-struck-the-slimmer-man-on-the-head-with-a-dinner-plate-florida-attorney-allegedly-attacks-father-of-girl-who-cut-in-front-of-him-in-buffet-line-at-meat-station/
Law & Crime · Florida attorney allegedly attacks man after being cut in front of in buffet line"From thereon, a melee began between a large number of the wedding guests," a deputy wrote in the police report.