Larry Russwurm<p>While driving one day on the plains of Asia, I was surprised to come up to a lineup of people. The finish of the line was over the horizon. They all had large packs with them, so you knew they were prepared.</p><p>Puzzled, I asked a man in line what it was that was so important to wait in this obviously long, slow moving line. He said simply, “We’re in line to summit Everest.”</p><p>“But we’re on the plains!” I shouted in disbelief.</p><p>“If you want to summit Everest, too, get to the back of the line,” he said.</p><p>I had more questions. “Are your packs full of food and water?”</p><p>“No, they’re full of mountaineering equipment.”</p><p>“How do you eat and drink and go to the bathroom?” I asked.</p><p>He looked at me as if I was daft. “Sherpas of course. Why, there is the provisions van now. You can see it near the horizon.”</p><p>Finally I asked him about the crux of the matter. “Why do you want to summit Everest so badly?”</p><p>“Well, a few years ago a speaker came to my town. He had summited Everest and had stories about it and made me want to do it, too.”</p><p>“You were inspired by his stories, then?”</p><p>“No. I was inspired by the way he was lording it over everyone else, I wanted to join him and do that also.”</p><p>Now that I knew his rationale I had something to suggest to him. “Even if you do this, there will be people who can still lord it over you. The seven summits people for instance.”</p><p>“You mean climbing the highest peaks on 7 continents? Well this is number 1. I could do the rest after this.”</p><p>“Then there are the 2nd highest peaks on 7 continents club, too.”</p><p>“Well I’m not ridiculous. Besides I have my own plan. I just may be able to lord it over everyone.”</p><p>Unsure of what he was talking about I asked, “I’d like to hear this plan.”</p><p>“You’re sure you’re not going to summit Everest?”</p><p>“Oh I’m sure.”</p><p>“Well let me whisper this in your ear.”</p><p>He whispered, “Mauna Kea is the tallest mountain in the world. It’s just that most of it is under water. I need one of those tough round submersibles but mine will have more glass. I’ll submerge to the base of Mauna Kea and roll it like a hamster in their hamster balls, all the way up to the ocean surface. Then I will emerge and climb the rest of the mountain. I’ll be the first and will possibly be knighted. Then I can literally lord it over almost anyone!”</p><p>He was done and pulled away from me. “Good plan,” I said.</p><p>I got back to my car and said, “I guess all you people are dying to climb Everest so have at it.”</p><p>I tried to get past the line in my car but it kept going. Finally I took a right and the line became just a memory.</p><p><a href="https://larryrusswurm.com/2024/02/17/summiting-everest/" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://larryrusswurm.com/2024/02/17/summiting-everest/</a></p><p><a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/7-summits/" target="_blank">#7Summits</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/asia/" target="_blank">#Asia</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/continents/" target="_blank">#continents</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/everest-is-highest-mountain/" target="_blank">#EverestIsHighestMountain</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/hamster-ball/" target="_blank">#hamsterBall</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/knighthood/" target="_blank">#knighthood</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/mauna-kea/" target="_blank">#MaunaKea</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/mount-everest/" target="_blank">#MountEverest</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/mountaineering-equipment/" target="_blank">#mountaineeringEquipment</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/plains/" target="_blank">#plains</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/provisions-van/" target="_blank">#provisionsVan</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/sherpas/" target="_blank">#sherpas</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/speaker/" target="_blank">#speaker</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/stories/" target="_blank">#stories</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/submersible/" target="_blank">#submersible</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/summiting-everest/" target="_blank">#summitingEverest</a> <a rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" class="hashtag u-tag u-category" href="https://larryrusswurm.com/tag/tallest-mountain-on-earth/" target="_blank">#tallestMountainOnEarth</a></p>