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#morpheus

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00:51am and there is a definite shadow on Mr. Moon. If the stars align, I may creep outside in my fuzzy robe at 3am to see the blood in the sky. The orbits of our celestial friends are a persistent reminder of the enormity of our universe and our smallness in comparison. Or maybe I will fall asleep and dream of more soldiers and chocolate mousse, as Morpheus weaves his stories in my mind. Wherever and whenever you are, I wish you peace.

Soooooo, #django hat sich entschlossen, den Tag zu beenden.
Hat er sich auch verdient
Erst heute morgen lange #hunderunde mit fast 8km
Dann direkt ins #Altenheim im Kreis #Paderborn, die älteren Menschen besuchen und bespassen
Abends noch mal die Sicherheit im Dorf gecheckt
Jetzt in #morpheus Armen, lässt er den Tag nochmal Revue passieren
Guts Nächtle @all
#GuteNachtTrööt
#dogs #dogsofmastodon #Mastodonrudel #hunde #Leonberger #leonbergers #hund #fotografie #fotomittwoch #TiereBauenBruecken

Holy cow this was a beautiful dream last night...

I dreamt I was on a school reunion (never happened and will never happen). The reunion was organized a bit like a prom: It was an all-day event and everybody was dressed like for a prom.

I went there with a suitcase full of stuff to wear because I wasn't sure how to present, given the fact that I had never seen any of the people since (counts fingers...) 1985.

And yes, there used to be a few far-right jerks in those days even in my class.

When I joined the initial event, I was dressed and presenting very femme. I remember *every single one* of the former school mates greeting me warmly, accepting - without even mentioning - who and what I was. *Every single one* of them were welcoming, kind and happy. And they all wanted me to be happy.

What was impressive: all of them knew that I was a trans non-binary person, not a trans woman. Even if I was presenting femme, nobody ever misgendered me or assumed I was a woman. All of them knew I am a non-binary person and treated me like this.

Side note: we all were young again in this dream. Like somewhere between 16-22 (I'd guess).

There was a party planned for the evening with dancing (ballroom dancing, like at a prom). I was very anxious to get to that party but didn't know what to wear. I definitely didn't want to wear a femme outfit. Even though I was treated as a non-binary person, I was so afraid of anyone assuming that I was a woman, it was weird.

Anyway, let's get to the core of the story: I used to have this amazing cis male friend when I was in school. We were like inseparable twins. We did everything together, but as two boys / young men. And he was there as well and anxious to finally meet me again. But he was the only one who didn't know that I had changed (or didn't realize what that meant, I dunno).

For the evening, I decided to go for complete "gender-fuck" outfit: I wore a very thin black turtleneck top, a 70ies-style pair of pants, which was clearly femme, and a light jacket. Seeing me, you'd get completely confused and would neither assume "man" nor "woman" at all. It was guaranteed to be complete and utter confusion.

I went to the party this way dressed. The question at the party was now: would I play the "male" or "female" role (i.e. ask someone for a dance or be asked).

And then that friend came to the party, dressed as a beautiful young man. He saw me. He was absolutely confused. He didn't know what to do with me. The warm bond between us was still there, but it was always something of a very "brotherly love" we had for each other and never physical closeness.

So I was sitting on a chair and still pondering how to act when I saw him, in the distance, thinking very, very hard - super concentrated - and then making a decision.

He then slowly but surely walked to me, stretched his hand out, bowed and asked me for a dance...

There were already tons of people dancing. I accepted, we walked to the dance floor. The other dancers stepped aside and made a circle around us (why?). It seems they all were curious at what *I* would do during the dance and there was all the tension that nobody really knew whether they should ask me for a dance or wait to be asked. Everybody was warm, kind but also nobody knew how to interact with me wrt dance. And this my beloved friend solved it for all of them.

Now there were two people dancing, classical ballroom: one of them obviously male (a man) and the other one *could* be a man, a woman, but also a manly woman, or something in between. But it was just a beautiful image.

After the dance we sat down at a table next to each other. The warmth, the closeness, the siblingly love was reborn.

We had an amazing reunion, my friend and I spent the whole night dancing, talking, hugging - and for the first time since we knew each other, we were also physically close (hugging, holding hands, arm in arm) - but all siblingly (platonically).

And everybody else at the party had a wonderful evening - laughing, dancing, and even the far-right people were no far-right anymore. They all interacted with me just in a "normal" way. Nobody ever mentioned my change or asked any questions or anything else. The only "awkward" moment was when the dance started and nobody knew whether I'd play the "active" or "passive" role and nobody dared to "test it".

What an amazing dream.
---
I woke up in the middle of the night - having just dreamt this. I know I had a smile on my face and my heart was full of love; love for all of them and especially for my friend.

I tried really hard to keep the memory of this dream. I managed to do so but at the expense of a second, equally beautiful dream I had after I went back to bed.